Sunday, January 23, 2011

My vices

I read this post last week and it really hit home for me.  Carbs and especially sugar are my true vices, and I think I may suffer from sugar addiction.

Cake (hence the name)
Cookies (specifically Golden Oreos...yum)
Ice Cream (Edy's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough)
Chocolate (Snicker Bars)
Chips (Utz plain ripple chips with Utz sour cream and onion dip)
Bread
Pasta
Rice

Lawdhammercy.  I'm only admitting this because I need to have full disclosure, right? 

I have no will-power when it comes to these things.  If it's here, I will eat it, consistently until it's gone.  I will daydream during my work-day about coming home to have a cookie.  I've devoured an entire pack of cookies in like 2 days before.  One time, I threw a pack out after eating half of it in a few hours.  Then I ended up taking it back out of the trash (it was on the top and closed...doesn't make it better, but still, lol) and ate more cookies.  I ended up having to pour dish detergent on the cookies and then putting them in the trash to "ruin" them to stop me from eating them.  That's crazy.  This my reality. 

My father is a smoker, but he also has emphysema.  He has about 20% capacity in one lung and the other looks like "swiss cheese", yet he still smokes.  I get so angry when he smokes and if someone buys him cigarettes I get angry with them too for enabling him.  I feel like he cares nothing about his health and don't understand why he could be so irresponsible when he knows that the cigarettes are killing him slowly.  But honestly, who am I to sit in judgement?  I'm allowing myself to cookie and cake my way into an early grave also.  An addiction is an addiction is an addiction. 

As they say in AA, I'm taking it one day at a time.

2 comments:

  1. I am going on this ride with you. :-)

    We are too beautiful to be obese. My husband is a smoker. and i hate it. Thank God my insurance plan for 2011 said if you have a smoker on your plan, then you have to either enroll in a tobacco cessation program or pay an additional 100 bucks a month. Yesterday was day 1 of my hubby not smoking. I'm so proud of him. 2011 we are getting healthier together. :-) While he's giving up the nicotine ghost, i'm giving up the food ghost. :)

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  2. YAY!!! I'm glad that hubby is giving up that ghost. I know that it's HARD, so I'm glad that you both are doing this together, even though the vices are different, lol.

    Thanks for riding with me AJ! :)

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